Getting Aboard The Strasburg Hype Train Will Needlessly Drain Your Bank Account

If you missed Stephen Strasburg's debut, you may have been one of the only people in the sports world to do so. The hype behind yesterday's game was so ridiculous that it spilled over into almost every aspect of sports coverage. Not only was MLB network broadcasting the game, but ESPN was giving live updates, and websites were doing trackers. In the hobby, it was similar, as Topps declared it Stephen Strasburg day, offering contests and giveaways related to his debut.

Aside from the massive amounts of coverage, many collectors were waiting on pins and needles to see if their investments were going to pay off, at least temporarily. Even though Strasburg was pitching against the worst team in baseball, he did have a pretty amazing performance with 14 Ks. Pittsburgh has won at least a few games, and the Nationals are almost as terrible. There was actually a good chance that he could pitch one run baseball and end up with the loss (not that record should have anything to do with it). I think people were just hoping that he wouldn’t screw the pooch too badly and get roughed up. I don’t believe anyone was expecting what actually happened though.

Over the last week, his values have gone from ridiculous to insane. I mean, for pitching in a collecting black hole, his cards were already AS expensive as Lincecum, a pitcher who has already done it all for a better team. Then, post-call up, his values went so high that I am continually surprised how much people are willing to pay for cards that have already hit their ceiling. Then when you consider that Strasburg will have his first Chrome auto coming later this year, and people are still paying what they are for the base bowman cards, I start to question the general intelligence of the hobby more so than I already do.

Check out some of these recent sales, and then tell me that the people who are buying these cards are looking at this the right way.

Base Bowman Chrome (NO AUTO) - This is a BASE card. A. BASE. CARD. I cant even explain this. I got mine for 17 dollars only because I had 13 ebay bucks. Now I may have to sell.

Bowman Orange Auto /25 - Cmon. Really? Wow. This is a nice card, sure, but for THAT much? Good lord.

Bowman Orange Auto /25 See previous explanation, then add some shock.

Bowman Base Auto - When was the last time you saw a prospect auto go for this much - even some of the higher number parallels? There cant be THAT many Nationals fans out there that would pay that much for a card with no upside.

Bowman Blue Auto /250 - Paying this much money for a card numbered THAT high is terrible. I really don’t get it, even more so when you see that he will be in EVERY product this year.

Bowman Base Auto BGS 9.5 - Double the price for a 9.5? Since when? It would be one thing if these cards were like the Chrome versions that had a lot of condition problems, I don’t think these had that kind of issue. Seriously though, there is never a reason to pay a 100% premium on a graded card, let alone one that is only a 9.5 and not a 10. What a scam.

Bowman Base Auto - This one broke five hundred? Im going to laugh at this one in a year or two I believe. Some Pujols first year autos don’t go for this much. PUJOLS. ALBERT EFFING PUJOLS.

Again, prospecting is prospecting, but buying at the extreme peak of a players values isnt even worth it for his biggest fans. Washington is a terrible team in a terrible sports city, and people are acting like he is a New York Yankee. His values CANNOT hold, so why waste your money and pay 40% more than you should. Its ridiculousness at its finest.

EDIT: The first Strasburg MCG giveaway card has 55 bids on it. I will laugh if the card from Topps U&H has no differences and is completely indistinguishable. (Thanks to dayf for letting me know that U&H is numbered differently. Everyone will need to spend a ton now to truly complete the base set. Nice job there.)

Can We Stop With The Less Products Equals More Argument?

I hate when news like the Topps axing comes around, not just because of the actual news itself, but of all the stupidity that starts flooding the internet like a biblical storm. Whether its people giving their good riddance to whatever went down, or people conjecturing about how the hobby sky is falling, its annoying all the way around. In fact, the net gets so polluted with ridiculous comments, that you cant escape it.

First, we need to stop with the whole "where are the children!?!" type of bullshit. Im sick of hearing that things are going south because kids arent around anymore. Fuck that. As I have said before, kids are not the primary focus of this hobby, nor should they be. Ever since the 90s, when investment crazed adults made this industry what it is now, kids have been out. That means the boom and the decline all rest on the shoulders of grown adults, not children. Ask any of the manufacturers who their biggest customers are, kids or adults. Ask them who they market to, kids or adults. Find out why a child hasnt been featured on any of those UD posters for SPX or whatever. Its because KIDS DONT FUCKING MATTER. From what I have gathered in talking with different people, kids who still remain in this hobby function like the adults that drive the market anyways, so dont shove that argument down my throat unless you want me to ignore you.

Secondly, less does not equal more. Yes, I get it. You want to go back to 4 products a year so you can get every card, but that isnt going to happen. Companies cannot survive on a few products, nor would having less products, in any understanding of the concept, be a good thing for anyone. Having variety in our lives is the reason why collecting is fun, as it gives you choice on how to mold your collection. It also gives you a chase element which keeps you coming back for more. If there were only 1 or 2 products per company, people would have what they needed so fast that it would be boring to wait for the next product. In addition, there wouldnt be any way to account for the massive amounts of mid year happenings in card form, an aspect most collectors love. Also, if one of those few products sucked, it would fucking blow to have to lose out on it because it was a badly conceptualized set.

Third, the hobby is fine, and the industry is not in any immediate danger, so shut the fuck up with your worrying. I dont need to be bombarded with people telling me that cards are done because Topps lost football. Cards are not done, the industry is adapting to lower sales, and people will collect until the apocalypse. The sooner that the idiots realize this fact, the better. In all honesty, there really is no solution to any of the problems affecting card sales until the economy fully rebounds. At that point, things will return to a different shade of normal, and we can all go back to our happy go lucky Beckett world without the fear of Armageddon.

Lastly, I dont think this part of the industry's nose job was the fault of the companies themselves, despite the chatter. NFL Players Inc sure lives in a wierd bubble, and I dont think they really get what they just did. Plus, with Topps getting their exclusive baseball license, I dont think they really care about losing football the way we think they do. Baseball is the biggest yard on the street, and they are now the only real, whole dog in the yard. Everyone else is a cat or dog with three legs. That counts for more than anyone could imagine.

So, in other words, it sucks that Topps and their history is gone, but shut up with the stupid noise about everything else.

People Are Just Stupid

I was looking around on eBay when I saw a situation that just screamed EPIC FAIL.


(CLICK TO ENLARGE)

I have been keeping tabs on these fake autographs, and I am actually convinced that the scam ones actually outnumber the real ones now. Either way, when you see one that is actually real posted in between the horrible fakes, with the fakes having more than 15 bids each, I laugh. There are actually that many people who think these cards are real. Considering that the autos on these cards look ABSOLUTELY NOTHING like any other auto any of the players have ever signed, I am curious as to how stupid you actually have to be to spend hundreds of dollars on one.

Maybe its the same people that buy these:

A Result Of Collective Stupidity

One of the more awesome trends in the industry is that regular cards can have amazing patches. What this means is that you dont need to face astronomical retail type odds to get a team logo or something amazing in terms of a patch. This also means that products like Triple Threads, and other products that rely on contrived scarcity to bolster value, no longer can justify the fact that 1/1s are special in any way from the rest of the product. Right now, more than a giant handful of Topps 1/1 cards are either printing plates or paralleled cards that share nothing more than a different finish on the stock.

Of course, this has led to a major devaluing of the 1/1s, because they arent worth the chase anymore. I can get a Topps Sterling 1/1 and have it look WORSE than the card out of ten. Shouldn't we just let the cards showcase what makes them special instead of forcing me to stomach a whole product's worth of cards numbered to 3, even though its really something like 103?

A while ago I said that they should get rid of inserting the print plates into packs, as they are worthless, fugly pieces of scrap metal that are marketed as a chase for people who dont know any better. Im saying now that we should abolish the non-special 1/1s for all non-chrome products. If they want to put a logo on a card and number it 1/1, be my guest, but if they are just going to say the card is arbitrarily a 1/1 because of a different color on the card, a different die cut swatch, or even if there is NOTHING different, I wont support it.

Parallels are ridiculous in this hobby and I think that Topps high end and Donini mid and low end are the worst possible offenders. Donini parallels each SUBSET card at least fifteen times, you have the regular, numbered parallel, jersey parallel, second lower numbered parallel, auto parallel, etc, etc. That sucks, there is no reason to do this at all, other than accounting for laziness in filling the needs of a product.

Im now a supporter of letting the card's features speak for themselves. If you get a great looking card with a ridiculous patch, it should be worth more because of that, not because its numbered to 7 or whatever. If you get an auto'ed version of a card rather than a regular one, that should be the reason that its worth more, not because its red rather than green.

Its become apparent that this hobby has thrived on greed and ego for many, many years. Someone needs to feel good that they have the ONLY ONE of that one card, someone has to know EXACTLY how many of a said card there are, they need to be the biggest shit out there. No longer are we focused on buying the cards we like or the cards that make us happy, we have to have the most of the rare, the most of the special, and we need parallels to tell us that we do. That is crap.

This fact has allowed the manufacturers to exploit our need to feel special by numbering things lower and lower, yet in reality just letting design quality slip so that the number on the card is the only thing we care about. Look at Upper Deck SP Authentic Baseball, there is so much confusion over the numbering on the letters, that people have literally freaked out. Upper Deck makes it worse by numbering each letter rather than the total number of autos to make the cards seem rarer, and we eat it up. Is your signed G numbered to 5 different than my signed G numbered to 25? NO! Its the same fucking card with lower numbering.

Ill give you this, the collective stupidity of the normal people in this hobby will prevent any semblance of a different hobby from ever surfacing. Collectors are generally so fucking stupid, that companies are even forced use numbering as a way to deter fakes. How absurd is that? People cannot survive in this industry without it BLATANTLY spelled out for them, no one is capable of thinking for themselves. This is why jersey cards have become so overdone, and why parallels are everywhere, because the idiots shit themselves with anticipation over whatever is the latest marketing ploy. It would be one thing if they were clever, but really these ploys are always mind numbingly stale.

It may be a problem in every industry, mainly because Americans are intrinsically stupid, but I get the aura of simpletons more from sports cards than from any other consumer group I follow.

Beckett and Donini: As If There Was Any Question Anymore

Thank you to reader Greg for sending this in care of the Beckett idiots.

I am not going to plug anything for them, but I want to point out a few things that are very VERY important to collectors who question any relationship between Panini and Beckett. Its getting to the point now where they are sharing lollipops and walking around with their hands in each other's back pockets. Im really hoping that people respond as wretchedly as I did.

For their upcoming "Screw The Hobby and The Collectors" event:

You can …
– Meet James Spence, the JSA staff, Beckett Media and Panini representatives.
SCU: So, now Beckett and Panini are doing events together? Sickening.

– Increase the value of your memorabilia by assuring its authenticity.
SCU: Third party authentication does not "assure authenticity," especially when it is done on site.

– Have your items authenticated and appraised by the best in the industry.
SCU: PSA has better authentication than JSA if you HAVE to do it. I don’t even need to point that out, everyone knows. As for the appraisal, I have no idea why people would have confidence in any appraisal from someone that values cards the way Beckett does.

– Get on-site encapsulation and grading performed by Beckett Grading Services and receive your item back the same day submitted.
SCU: Another scam, perpetrated by people who only want your money. Fuck, they NEED your money.

– Attend free seminars and Q&A sessions from BGS, JSA, and Panini representatives.
SCU: I would pay someone to go and ask why Beckett thinks it’s not a conflict of interest to partner with a company whose value and sales are helped/hurt by the price guide.

– Win free stuff from Panini and Beckett Media.
SCU: Swag is good enough reason to go and perform the above request.

– Participate in a Card Grading Contest. How accurately can you grade
under BGS/BVG standards?
SCU: Im guessing since its all arbitrary and subjective, you can be AS GOOD as the "professionals!"

– Meet Beckett Select Auction staff for free evaluation of your high-end sports collectibles.
SCU: See above with the appraisals. "So, my Marty Cordova authenticated JSA jersey is worth 400 bucks according to you? Awesome, now find me a buyer at that price."

Please, please, please, someone in texas please go to this event to fuck shit up. I would laugh hysterically and offer you plugs galore for whatever you want. I don’t think there could be a better event for SCU readers, especially with all the wonderful appraisals they will give you. Hell, go get your card graded by the "best in the business." Hahahaha.

One More Inspired Post On Retail Versus Hobby

Its been a while since I have covered the retail versus hobby discussion, and I want to revisit things. This is mainly because its been brought to the forefront of my mind by some guy who complained about his latest retail purchase he bought for hits. For those of you who don’t know, I hate retail packs and blasters. They are a complete waste of money and should never be bought unless they meet one of the exceptions. When I say complete waste of money, I mean you should go to a strip club and buy a 20 dollar lap dance instead of purchasing a blaster or, god forbid, retail loose packs.

Just to show you what I mean, ill give you an idea of what you are up against when you buy retail. First, if you buy loose packs, you are dealing with every person who has already gone through the packs for the 2 dollar jersey cards. In fact, for most of the retail products, there are actually special crap jersey sets they create just to give the products some content. If you are lucky to hit anything, you have just beaten incredible odds. Instead of putting your money in a pile, dousing it in lighter fluid and torching it, go buy something else at Target. I mean, there are a lot of wonderful things to choose from instead of cards. Even if you are just there to buy diapers and condoms, stay as far away as possible.

For Blasters over loose packs, its not much different, even though most of them are now guaranteeing hits per box. At 20 bucks a piece, you will end up with a bunch of base, numbered inserts, and a 2 dollar jersey card. If you like the base, that’s one thing, but if you are looking for hits, you buy a blaster, and then you complain, you deserve to be thrown into a bath of sun warmed pig urine. Its like buying a Kia Spectra and complaining you didn’t get a Caddy. God damn.

For the record, if you say that you buy retail because there isnt a shop around, you are an impatient little brat. Go to blowout or ebay, and wait three fucking days before you go throw your money away. For 80% of the country, blowout can get you a box in 3 days, and then you have a nice hobby box to break with actual chances at hitting something good.

There are exceptions, no doubt, to the rule, but they are very limited. Of course, if you like collecting sets and you don’t care about hits, fine, buy the retail stuff. I hate base cards, I don’t set collect, and I think it’s a waste of money to buy pack after pack when you can buy the entire thing with short prints for half the cost and a fourth of the opportunity cost. That’s another post all together, though, however it’s a reason people can buy retail without feeling bad.

Another exception is anything with Chrome in the title. Blasters of Topps or Bowman Chrome will usually provide the same cards from hobby packs, but the auto odds are much more against you. This should only be a last resort, as the hobby packs are still better. However, for football they do have other parallels that are worth some, thus making Chrome Retail not TOO bad. Ginter cards usually fall under this as well, but most people use this exception to build the set cheaper than box breaking.

That’s about all the exceptions there are. Because the hobby has moved FAR away from valuing memorabilia cards, the guaranteed hit has lost its luster. Don’t let that guarantee fool you, the product is not in anyway superior to hobby. Also, manufacturers have to pay more for retail packaging and anti theft, so for what you pay for, you usually get astronomical odds, less cards, and more susceptibility to searchers.

EDIT: okay, now that I am going over my past posts and seeing resposes from people who buy retail on the boards, I think its still better to buy hobby even if you only collect the base. Most of the time, the hobby packs contain more cards, more chances at SPs, and better bang for your buck. Therefore, if you are going to pay 20 bucks for 7 retail packs of 3-4 cards you are going to get 21 cards, some of which may be numbered inserts. Hobby, for twenty bucks, you can get 5 packs of 6-10 cards each and end up with 30-50 cards with some being the same numbered inserts, autos, and all the other promised hobby exclusives. Please someone tell me why anyone would buy retail knowing that every pack will give you LESS for your money. Retail sucks.

How Are The Fake Stickers Done?

From JustinD:

Gellman, 

Any common rubbing alcohol will remove Sharpie. A calm hand with a q-tip of rubbing alcohol (99% will work best and evaporate quickly before clouding the sticker) should clean up a sticker logo with no damage. You should also be able to peel it up nicely with a thin razor (the old paper thin two sided refill kind your grandpa used).

My worry is also elsewhere in elkridgesportscards listings. As you can easily see the sticker autos are faked. However they are also listing several fake logo patches, which means they are moving forward in scamming. The worry for me is that all of the buyback autos they have listed look fake too. I think they are peeling topps holos and sticking them on base cards and signing them. All those autos look off, and the topps seals on the holders look strange. I think it is another step in the fakery for elkridge.

Thanks,
JustinD

Thanks Justin, hopefully this post will not be used for evil. 

NOTE: Justin is not the person selling these cards.

NOTE 2: See the video from Rob at VOTC. For the record, its Gellman with a G like Golf, haha.

Dammit!! This Is Now A Freaking Epidemic

Ewensel emailed this auction for a Reggie Bush Bowman Chrome Auto that sold for 70 dollars. Notice anything a little off from one like this one?

The first card was not an auto card to begin with, dont let the refractor throw you. Notice the off sig, the missing ghost box where the sticker needs to be put, and im sure the missing cert sticker on the back. Looks like someone either found a way to rub off the auto on another crap sticker and put it on this card with a fake bush sig, or got their hands on a blank sheet of Topps stickers and started signing for dollars. 

See, guys, it was only a matter of time before the sticker system was taken advantage of buy douchebags who love to drink sun dried period blood for sustenance. This guy is one of those douchebags, and must have taken some pointers from the genius who put not one, not two, but THREE NFL logo patches in this Eli Manning card. The sticker there is not real either, Manning's card was never autoed to start.

EDIT: This is quickly becoming an epidemic. Guys, please watch out for these obviously fake auto stickers that are being applied to non-auto cards.

More Douchebaggery From The Mainstream Hobby Media

Most of you probably know all about Sports Collector Digest, its one of those news sources that I cant fathom people reading for info, but many still do.

*facepalm*

Rob over at VOTC has posted a link to some pretty damning stuff about SCD and their relationship with Coaches Corner Auctions, who seem to be allowing awful fakes, shill bidded items, and all sorts of big no-no's to be auctioned off to unsuspecting people.

The link Rob provided is from Frozen Pond, another auction related website, who did a huge write up on these incidents, and from this article, you can imagine that many collectors have much more of a knowledge of most items than the auction houses that sell them. This shows quite a horrible track record for SCD and CCA.

See, for those of you who think the mainstream hobby media has any reason to provide reasonable coverage, you are wrong. They only care about one thing and it isnt which set is the best of the year. Its green, and they need it to function. I will say that even though the post is from a site that specializes in auctions, it still doesnt make it wrong.

Its situations like this that make me continue to support a mainstream hobby media boycott, as it is just ridiculous the conflicts of interest that plague it. At least, with most if not all bloggers, you know we are collectors who care enough to write about the hobby for free.

Thanks Rob for uncovering the Douchebaggery at its finest.

Entellajince, Something Is Missing...

Thank you to the people who sent me this auction, I love it.

In other news, Boston College just fell 10 spots in the rankings for US News' list of best colleges.




H/T - Jeff, Matt, Gary

2009 NFL Draft: My Reflections

As we enter into the football-less wasteland of summer, the draft is what will have to sustain us until the pre-season starts in august. Overall, I think the draft was pretty fun to watch this whole time, and the first round had me glued to the TV now that teams were forced to pick a little quicker and because ESPN (no NFL Network access at my house) didnt miss any picks this year.

There were no shortage of surprises in the first round, especially with the Jets trading up to get Sanchez, and the Raiders taking Heyward-Bey at #7. When we look back on this draft in a few years, I think both of these moves will be considered pretty dumb, mainly the depth at WR in the first round DID NOT justify the Raiders' pick with Maclin AND Crabtree on the board. As for Sanchez, the Jets would have probably been better waiting until next year, with a much deeper and more talented bunch of QBs that will be coming out.

There were quite a few reaches as there were last year as well, mainly Larry English being drafted mid first round, and the reach at three by the Chiefs, or why you pass up Curry for a guy who probably would have been better to trade down for. Then when the Bungles pass on Crabtree at number 6 to take the Sta-puft Marshmallow man, I almost gasped out loud. You lose Housh, you have to deal constantly with Chad Johnson, and you pass on a great talent a la Calvin Johnson to take a guy who couldnt even put it together for the job interview of his life. Good job.

As for the people who fell, Beanie Wells making it all the way to Cardinals is a shock, and I think the people like the Eagles will be sorry that they didnt get someone to tag team with the aging and somewhat fragile Westbrook. Maualunga falling as far as he did was also pretty ridiculous, though great USC linebackers do come a dime a dozen as we have found out.

I will give props to Oher, who remained driven and positive despite ESPN constantly playing the awful "troubled past" card. He just wants to play, and the Ravens were right to jump all over him. ESPN needs to learn that a human interest story is only interesting if it is not beaten to death. Then again, with Chris "YWML" Berman at the desk, thats pretty tough to avoid.

As we moved into the second round, and the Broncos traded NEXT year's #1 for a pick to get Alphonso Smith, I couldnt help but think things were heading down a bad road for a team that just lost a huge piece. Then again, they did great with drafting Moreno, so hopefully Neckbeard wont be without too many options.

Lastly, in terms of hobby impact, here are how I think things will sort out now that we know the teams that the top guys went to:

1) Matthew Stafford

2) Knowshon Moreno

3) Michael Crabtree

4) Mark Sanchez

5) Josh Freeman

6) Beanie Wells (Peterson Effect*)

7) Donald Brown (Peterson Effect*)

8) Jeremy Maclin

9) Darrius Heyward-Bey

10) Percy Harvin

* Peterson Effect - Prices start high solely because of idiots wanting to get in on the bottom level for a guy that plays the same position that AD plays. Yeah, like lightning is going to strike twice in 2 years, right?

I Heart Ebay Idiots and Idiots In General

Oh my god, Wheeler, thank you for sending this to me.

So, lets get you the run down on this auction:

Graded 1/1 - Check
Graded NFL Shield Card - Check
Non-gem grade - Check
Complete and Utter Idiot - Check
Population report published in the auction - WTF?

Not only do you have a guy who has ridiculously graded his NFL shield Felix Jones card from NT, but he has also published a population report in his auction. Why? If the card is a 1/1 is there really a need to show where all the cards have fallen? No, as there is only one. Duh. See, the practice of grading cards like this is fucking stupid to begin with, but to show the bidders where it stands among its non-existant counterparts is borderline mentally disabled.

Again, what will grading this card serve? Nothing. Also, what will adding the pop report to the auction serve? Nothing, but it will show that you are a clueless douche. Congrats my nizzle, you are one with the brain.

A Comment On The Blog

Come the end of March, SCU will turn one, and I will be very happy that I have lasted as long as I have. Its really hard work to maintain the blog as much as I have, and I didnt think it would last. Luckily for me, the people are the reason I stay around, mainly because I am so self absorbed that I love my soap box way too much to give it up, right?

Ill say this, over the last few weeks, I have received a plethora of comments like "The world would be a better if you just went and killed yourself" and stuff like that. Personally, I love to read those types of comments because when I have disturbed you enough to make you write that, I have done my job. I win.

In fact, I just got a comment that was something like, "you care way too much about the way people spend their money..." Umm, right. See, to say something stupid like that is missing the point of blogging in general. This is because blogging is ONLY about giving commentary or opinion on things, and that is why those type of people show up on the posts I do. My opinion and commentary on those people is that they are idiots, and therefore they are highlighted for their intrinsic comedic value. I dont really spend much more time thinking about them. If I get a laugh out of it, then I assume that most of the collectors who read this will too. If you dont or wont get a laugh, feel free to read one of the 100 other blogs until I post something you like. God forbid, dont write your own opinion on a blog, no, just post anonymous comments on all the existing ones. Yes, that is a better idea.

Normally, I dont really care about comments, as I think its one of the main reason I write here. But that type just kind of struck me as weird. Listen, if you want to leave an opinion, please do so, but add something to the conversation. Dont just throw stupid statements like "go fuck yourself" out, because A) they wont be approved, B) I will laugh at you, C) its completely sophomoric and adds nothing to the blog. See, even negative opinions add something to the blog, stupid comments do less than McBain's goggles.

Lets Clear This Up For The Clueless People Out There

People, people, people, do you really think these cards are from the Jerseys the players actually wear in the all star game? Wow, its stupid to me that people love these cards. First off, they are player touched, at least I hope they are. Secondly, this piece is from the Jerseys they wore either during the derby (not likely), during warmups (not likely), or during a special event sponsored by topps (very likely). They were definitely not warn during the game.

Dont believe me? Here is a picture for proof.

See? No name on the back of the jersey, and the letter above in the card is white, not black, regardless. Guys, dont be stupid and pay five million dollars for this card, it isnt worth your time. Stick to the autos and other crap you can get. This stuff is junk with no picture on it (or a very small one).

Seriously, sucker born every minute.

If A Player Scores Low On This, I Wonder About Their Prospects In Life

ESPN has published a sample copy of the wonderlic test, and I must say I am shocked that anyone can do poorly on this test. Here is a sample question:

The 9th month of the year is?

A. October
B. January
C. June
D. September
E. May

I almost cried I was laughing so hard. Seriously, players have been known to score next to zero.

Topps Continues To Suck At Everything

Printing plates are my least favorite type of 1/1, especially when they are done by topps. It’s a fucking asinine way to appease the Beckett thumping Joe Collectors, and I don’t think I would ever pay for one or recommend even keeping one. If I pulled one of Adrian Peterson, you better believe that it would be on eBay the next day. Just a fucking stupid pull, yet people still go fucking nuts when they pull them, screaming "MOJO!!!!!!" like they are that kid who got the Nintendo 64 for christmas. God I hate people who say that shit, but that is a different post all together.

Well, this one takes the cake, but coming from topps, I am not at all surprised.



This is a 1/1 printing plate of Mushin Muhammad that has some retard pooping his pants on SCF. I swear to god, there is no fucking reason this should be in the set. It is a sheet of metal that someone slapped a topps sticker on the back of. It just floors me every time I see this shit. But wait, it doesnt stop!

Below is another gem from Topps Triple Suck, wonderful how they have like 20 of these per card per player. Can someone find a name on this worthless piece of metal? No? Hmm, let me relate Triple Suck to something a little more concrete. A few years back, Kia tried passing one of their cars off as a luxury car worthy of competing with the top luxury cars in its class. They put out commercials, and all sorts of bullshit to try to make me think that their cars were good for someone looking for luxury. The whole time I was watching, I was just screaming in my head, "IT’S A FUCKING KIA!! WHAT THE FUCK?!?" That’s what Topps is to high end. They are a Kia trying to compete with Mercedes and BMW. Wonderful.

This Is What Happens When You Are An Idiot Shop Owner

Most of the JD Booty SP Authentic 3 colors have gone for around 30-40 bucks. This guy, who lives in "CARD CITY" thought that was a little low. Considering that Booty is a 6th rounder QB on a team that has been shopping for a TJack replacement, I wholeheartedly agree that he should try to get 500% of the real value of the card. I was going to offer 195, but I saw that he wasnt taking offers. Too bad really. Although the taupe pattern carpet in the background is a nice touch, CARPET-JO!

Sometimes You Just Wonder...

So, this weekend, I was on a trek to the grocery store, and I spotted a store that I had never seen before. It had always been there, I just never noticed it tucked away in a little strip mall, about 10 minutes from my apartment my mother's basement.

From the decorations, it is one of those shops that never updates anything, and just relies on being there for customers. I decided to go in, despite the Beckett propaganda all over the front entrance. It was a small store, but they seemed to have a few people inside, which was intriguing, but not encouraging. The experience I had was one of the worst experiences I have had in a store since I started writing. It wasnt poor customer service, and it wasnt mean people, it was just pure, unadulterated loathing and ridiculous comments.

I wanted some SPA packs just to try my luck, but this store didnt even have anything past Bowman Chrome on the release calendar except for a monsterous display of, you guessed it, Triple Threads. I immediately cringed.

As I walked through the store, the guy had singles upon singles, upon thousands of singles, mostly baseball, ALL priced AT book value. In the cases there were big signs that informed that most of the cards were 25%-40% percent off for their Valentines day sale. Ha. However, when the cards are already inflated 100% past ACTUAL value, 25-40% is a drop in the bucket. Again, I cringe.

The store owner, a seemingly nice guy, comes over to me while I was looking at the Football case. He starts to talk about how this guy comes in with hundreds of "SIIIICK" cards, and he buys them all for a lot of money because, "people eat that shit up." *cringe* The cards in the case were all the 2 dollar jersey cards and scrub autos from all the sets of the year, with the best of them being a McFadden Press Poop auto in a 3 inch thick plastic screwdown. On top of all this, there was a huge sticker on it that said "McFadden MOJO - $150!" I almost barfed up my corned beef sandwich I had eaten for lunch. He proceeds to show me all of his "siiiick" cards, which include a Dwayne Jarrett exquisite jersey card, a Joe Thomas Absolute RPM jersey card, and a Felix Jones jersey out of Classics retail - all priced above 50 dollars.

He even mentions how much he paid for around 350-500 cards, none of which would break the ten dollar barrier on eBay: $2,500 dollars. I actually laughed. He gave me a weird look, and I said, "Wow, you took him to the cleaners" in a sincere fashion. The owner goes, "I know! The guy was an idiot!" Wow, good for him. Good for him.

I walk over to his front counter with the wax, filled with Becketts, and another customer was already there. He was about to buy a box of the *new* 2008 Topps Football, and he saw the guy's new holy grail behind the counter. A Steve Slaton SPA patch auto, without a price sticker on it. He asks if its for sale, the owner says no. "Slaton has an UP ARROW in the new Beckett, so I want to wait and see where it ends up." The guy says that Slaton is awesome, and he buys his box and leaves. I saw the price of the box - 85 dollars. Holy fuck.

I ask if he has any more SPA, for shits, and he says he sold his box already. He opened one himself and pulled the Slaton. He then says a line that I had to leave before I busted out laughing for good. "You should get this Triple Threads stuff, there is some of the Sickest Mojo I have ever seen in my entire life! Best set ever produced. I bought two cases because I know people will buy it all up."

I left without hesitation. It was like being in a church if I were a vampire.

It is at this point in reading my post that you wonder how a store with all this shit going on stays open. I know that I couldnt fathom how shops are closing everywhere, but this guy is still having the time of his fucking life. See, the Beckett disease is still supporting hobby idiots, and people are still using it for their daily collecting life. Its sad. My thoughts and prayers are with the families of the affected.

Dont be that guy.



What a waste.

Someone Paid a Hell Of A Lot For This Card, Wow.

Thanks to Wheeler for passing this on.

I guess that the Forte logo out of SPA has been pulled and sold, and it went for an INSANEULOUS amount of money.

Let me refresh your memory of my hatred for the popularity of Forte's cards: the guy is a mid level prospect, playing for a team that didnt make the playoffs, and did not make ROY. He had a good rookie season, by rookie standards, but things sort of tapered off for him at the end. Usually, stupid things drive a cards worth like what I mentioned above, pro bowl appearances, etc, and yet without that, his still went for a down payment on a car.

When he ends up as the next Rudi Johnson, I just want a big I told you so.

Cue the Forte lovers telling me I am an idiot...

YouTube: The Hobby's Latest Dick Measuring Contest

Its truly hard to believe that over the last 6 months, Youtube has gone from the premier place to find info on box breaks and recent products, to a bunch of 13 year olds having a pissing contest on their webcams. Rather than having actual box breakers and collectors go on youtube to get info on the latest product, or watch box breaks of something they could only dream of busting, youtube has become a haven for asshats who go on only to belittle people who show that they may have a bigger Tube-dick than they themselves have.

Ill tell you the truth, I dont watch much stuff on the Tube anymore. Its just not worth my time to wade through a sea of retarded fucking maildays and shoutout videos from the latest pube-less dick face. I think its become obvious that just because you have ability to use the medium, does not mean you should. I should know, as I have reduced my own participation to only SCU breaks and a few commentary videos here and there to spread the word. Lately, all that those videos have attracted is a bunch of cum dumpsters who feel empowered by the fifth grade fat jokes they leave. Its fine for me, as I am used to it, but I could see a lot of people feeling like I did, the first time it happened.

Yeah, yeah, I know, that is all YouTube is good for these days. I should not be surprised, right? Well, as recently as july of last year, there were still quite a few channels I enjoyed watching. Guess what? Almost all of them are gone. The reasoning? The service they were once happy to provide to the collecting world had become too costly due to the sheer number of awful people that burrowed their way deep into the throws of the video blogosphere.

If there really was a person who wanted to have the biggest dick of all the micro-penised youtubers, they would create a place where the correct people could post their services for all to enjoy. No more willy nilly videos posting the daily shit that comes through your mailboxes, but rather a community approval based system that showcases the last of videos that are actually worth my fucking time.

Want to spend five minutes on camera showcasing your 2 dollar jersey collection? Take it to youtube. Want to videotape yourself berating another well respected channel because he wouldnt stroke your small dick with a shoutout? Get the fuck back to youtube hell. Want to post a well documented break of a product that we all can appreciate? Post at will, please.

I long for the days of the Chri5784 and a handful of dedicated box breakers. Hopefully we can get back to the good ole days, and fast.