Tuesday, January 6, 2009

YouTube: The Hobby's Latest Dick Measuring Contest

Its truly hard to believe that over the last 6 months, Youtube has gone from the premier place to find info on box breaks and recent products, to a bunch of 13 year olds having a pissing contest on their webcams. Rather than having actual box breakers and collectors go on youtube to get info on the latest product, or watch box breaks of something they could only dream of busting, youtube has become a haven for asshats who go on only to belittle people who show that they may have a bigger Tube-dick than they themselves have.

Ill tell you the truth, I dont watch much stuff on the Tube anymore. Its just not worth my time to wade through a sea of retarded fucking maildays and shoutout videos from the latest pube-less dick face. I think its become obvious that just because you have ability to use the medium, does not mean you should. I should know, as I have reduced my own participation to only SCU breaks and a few commentary videos here and there to spread the word. Lately, all that those videos have attracted is a bunch of cum dumpsters who feel empowered by the fifth grade fat jokes they leave. Its fine for me, as I am used to it, but I could see a lot of people feeling like I did, the first time it happened.

Yeah, yeah, I know, that is all YouTube is good for these days. I should not be surprised, right? Well, as recently as july of last year, there were still quite a few channels I enjoyed watching. Guess what? Almost all of them are gone. The reasoning? The service they were once happy to provide to the collecting world had become too costly due to the sheer number of awful people that burrowed their way deep into the throws of the video blogosphere.

If there really was a person who wanted to have the biggest dick of all the micro-penised youtubers, they would create a place where the correct people could post their services for all to enjoy. No more willy nilly videos posting the daily shit that comes through your mailboxes, but rather a community approval based system that showcases the last of videos that are actually worth my fucking time.

Want to spend five minutes on camera showcasing your 2 dollar jersey collection? Take it to youtube. Want to videotape yourself berating another well respected channel because he wouldnt stroke your small dick with a shoutout? Get the fuck back to youtube hell. Want to post a well documented break of a product that we all can appreciate? Post at will, please.

I long for the days of the Chri5784 and a handful of dedicated box breakers. Hopefully we can get back to the good ole days, and fast.


  1. I stopped using YouTube a long time ago. I have two boxes coming in soon and I will be filming and posting them on Vimeo. It's got higher quality videos and less obnoxious users.

  2. You can make a site. We'll call it Gellman's Big Fucking Video Box. It'll be great.

  3. You must be one lazy man...I find all sorts of legit box breaks on YouTube. All you have to do is find someone with a lot of box breaks, watch a couple to see if they good, and decide whether to stick with them or not. That is the sole purpose of the subscribe feature on YouTube.

  4. GET 'EM!

    I don't watch YouTube videos, but from the way you talk about it, I am sure I agree with you.

  5. Wow -that was quite the rant. What brought all of that on?

    I think it's like sifting for gold. You might actually find something great, but most of the time it's just a pile of dirt.

  6. The only breaks I will watch anymore are Chris5784. His are always simple, well filmed and he has new ones about every day. I agree with you, the most of the rest is just annoying garbage.

  7. I agree, YouTube has gone downhill a bit with all these kids making videos about nothing. Unfortunately, this is not only being done by the 13 yr olds, but you have grown "men" making dumb ass videos because they all of a sudden think that they are a YouTube superstar (one user's latest drunken vid comes to mind, but I wont name names).

    Despite all of this, there are still some good channels out there to be watched if you want to see some quality cards. Chris is still doing his thing, ARplatinum is getting back into the swing of things, and there are a few notable "prospects" who may have potential (case3223, skyler81501, hobbykings).

    I know you are VERY anti-mailday, but I sometimes enjoy them because they do give me a chance to see some nice cards that I otherwise might not get a chance to see...as for the "hey I got 3-50 cent scrub rookies in the mail" videos...I just ignore those. I am also glad for the videos that give us warnings about people not to trade with on the trading forums and who not to buy from on eBay (when they are legit)...I have done one or two of these myself.

    And BTW, not all YouTube boxbreakers are the type with dicks...give us lady boxbreakers some luv too ;)


  8. That's why I started Card Corner Club TV and created video highlights, a better way to do box breaks"

    Typically most existing videos focus to much on the person opening packs and not enough on content. Also 3-5 minutes is wasted watching packs and boxes being opened. I have got box breaks down to 3-5 minutes total depending on the product. Content rich and easy to view. If Mario is a subscriber, I must be doing something right.


  9. Classic rant. I couldn't agree more. The labels you use are funny too. Peace.

  10. Dude I think that's a bit harsh... Although I agree that there is a lot of crap on YouTube as far as our hobby goes, you just do what you would do with regular TV - SKIP IT.

    Truth is, some of these young kids making shout out videos are the future of our great hobby. There are 9 and 10 year olds busting boxes and getting all excited about a Rickie Weeks game used card from Topps. Isn't that what this hobby is all about?

    I don't watch a lot of the young kids - I am 41 myself and probably one of the oldest YouTube box breakers out there - but I think it's flat awesome that these kids are out there talking about baseball cards on video. I say Shout Out all you want and let's get some more excited kids in this hobby!!


  11. Jawdy,

    I dont think you get what I am talking about. I am not just referencing the kids who do legit breaks, I am talking about the douchefaced 12 year olds who add nothing and spend their days leaving ridiculous comments and bashing on people.

  12. You know what Gellman...im sorry...I think I had a temporary moment of insanity. I take back the complements I gave YouTube (save the recommendations of the people who still get it). That place has gone to shit and all of the fun has completely be sucked out of it. I think I finally reached my breaking point while trying to explain to a supposedly grown ass man how his stupidity is helping to breed a new generation of kids who have nothing better to do than to make "I hate you, die you cocksucker" rant videos and use the words "EPIC", "SICK", or "MOJO" (along with the "n" word thrown in there for laughs) at least 3 times in every sentence. These little kids have become mindless little drones who go bash on someone just because the leaders of their little YouTube cliques point the finger. Madness...

    It's a fucking shame that the medium that bought me back to collecting after being out of the game for a couple years is making me want to stick all of my cards back in the closet and say fuck it.

    I think I will take Wax Heaven's suggestion and check out Vimeo.