Thursday, March 11, 2010

Anatomy of a Scammer - 2009 SP Authentic Edition

NOTE: I will be out starting today, but there should be a few new posts done by some of the people who graciously offered to help out in my absence. Here is the first one from my friend Voluntarheel, one of the more boring and not hilarious people that frequently comments on the site. He once entertained over at his own (now sadly defunct) blog, and this is his not-so-triumphant return to the blogging world.


Fakes in SP Authentic are nothing new. Gellman has written about it more times that I can count. However I wanted to look in depth at all the moving parts that go into being a Crowned Prince of Taintsburg. I found a good example in a current Matthew Stafford SP Authentic Patch Auto. So let’s elephant-walk through this together.

  1. Too-good-to-be-true Patch. This Stafford patch is crazy. It is supposed to be the middle of the nine on his sleeve. I have never seen a patch like this in any product with small patch windows. It doesn’t fit the typical SP Authentic patch style either.
  1. Bubbling on the too-good-to-be-true Patch. If you look close, you can see on the right side, some bubbling of the patch. This is a classic sign of patch manipulation.
  1. Private listing. I have a few simple rules about dealing with eBay sellers. One non-negotiable is that I NEVER deal with sellers who run private auctions. It is the #1 tool of shill bid artists. It also prohibits you from contacting the buyers after they leave feedback to tell them they probably have a fake on their hands. Why would you ever trust a seller who hides who is bidding? In other words, why would you trust this douche selling the Stafford.
  1. Price jumps well above other similar auctions quicker than usual. Yeah, this auction had that too.
  1. Hidden serial numbers. What really drove my attention on this auction is the crop job on the scan. Notice anything interesting? Yeah, they cropped out the serial number. And they also failed to mention the exact number in the description. This is interesting in that this year Jeff started the SP Authentic Project with the idea to log every patch auto in an effort to keep a record of accurate patches and serial numbers. This crop sidesteps this site and is a fairly new twist in the ever-adapting underworld of fakes. The Stafford isn't the only one he has done it to. Pretty much any patch he has replaced, he has cropped the scan to eliminate the number, including the Sanchez he has up for sale right now.
  1. Seller has a history of crazy, Crazy, CRazy, CRAzy, CRAZY patches.
  1. The Seller is too stupid to cover his tracks in his feedback profile. This Marino he is selling now can be found HERE with a worse patch. He has also managed to snag an impressive amount of redemptions for Harvin and others while also picking up 1 color patch autos of some more. I would expect some otherworldly patches for his Harvin cards coming soon. Also, the 1 color Stafford he bought HERE, I’d expect to see an upgrade in a few weeks.

Any of these points taken separately, with the exception of #7, doesn’t mean that any card is an absolute forgery. However when things start to snowball like it does here, then alarms should start going off like Dwight Schrute’s Gaydar.

So hears to you ufjumper7. I hope one day this catches up to you in the form of Najeh Davenport mistaking your face for a laundry basket.


  1. The difference in price between the 2 Marino's was $25.25. Taking into account he had to pay for postage for the card to get to him, the cost of the fake patch, the listing fee and the seller's fee he sure didn't make much for the effort.

    Oh well, I'm sure jesus still loves him or her.

  2. Ah, see, this is how one does research on what they are buying...

  3. Well whatta ya know. I agree with everything Alex says! Go have yourself a Coke and a smile!

  4. Oh, Thanks Vountarheel. You know I love you. Though not in a gay way. jesus hates gays, just like he hates women, non-white people, people who don't speak english, the disabled......

    Oh, and I don't drink Coke. That stuff is really bad for you, and the company is the definition of "evil corporation".

  5. Wax Wombat,

    That's probably a better title for the post. 'How to research you mojo patch for dummies'

  6. Alex, You are the whiniest atheist I have ever come across.

    Now excuse me while I go drink my "evil corporation" cola and continue to laugh at your desperation. Cheers! (in no way referring to the giant evil corporate television show that made millions exploiting promiscuity and alcoholism)