Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Ebay Pisses Me Off Sometimes

Ebay can be the best place in the world, but it can also be a scam ridden cesspool, teeming with horrible and stupid people. When I got my virtual MEBAS (Masters of Ebay Buying and Selling) after spending years of working within the system, I have a list of grievences that I need to air per my pre-Festivus party planning list.

First, if you buy an item, you better be ready to pay for it then, not seven to ten days later. I know that eBay policies lay out their feelings on it, but paypal has changed the game. Fifteen years ago, it was done all through the mail, so I can understand any issues they needed to institute policies for. However, now, with most sellers ONLY taking paypal or similar services, there needs to be a common courtesy statute. I don’t want to hear about any money problems a buyer has, because that’s a 'your problem' not a 'my problem.' Pay as soon as you possibly can click the mouse over to paypal because I hate waiting when they knew the bill was coming. If you didn’t have the money you shouldn’t have bought, plain and simple.

Second, I hate people that don’t check their emails. This kind of relates to the above, because I have gotten the "I didn’t pay because I didn’t know" excuse way too many times. This also relates to item questions and BIN offers, especially when your iPhone gives you instant email updates. If I send a question, I expect a response ASAP, at least within that first 24 hours. That gives ample time for you to find out the answer and send it my way. Waiting until two minutes before the auction ends is complete poop. With BIN offers, I understand that you want to gauge interest in offers, but don’t let me sit there waiting. In fact, I avoid BIN/BO items with multiple expired offers.

That brings me to the next thing, BIN offers themselves. Ebay gives sellers the opportunity to counter offer, so they need to fucking use it. If I give you a reasonable offer, I think it is well within your role as a seller to counter if you do not think it is enough. If I am lowballing (which I have given up on), then I understand. But don’t reject my market value offer because you are a douche with no understanding of the BIN system. Don’t put your item up if you arent going to sell.

Speaking of selling but not selling, I have said before that using ebay as your personal photobucket is stupid and a complete waste of my fucking time. If you arent going to sell your item, go post a mailday message on a board or something. I don’t need to waste my time sending offers your way if you arent going to sell. Yes, yes, I know that there are success stories of people putting ridiculous BINs and getting a sale from a crazy person, but that is the exception to the rule. Stop with the show offs and get back to your regularly scheduled auctions.

Also, please do not send me a list of demands with your lowball BIN offer. I am not going to ship to Taiwan when it EXPLICITLY says otherwise in my auctions, and I am not going to waive shipping because you are begging me to help you. Ill deny you every single time just for being a thorn in my side.

Lastly, I hate shitty photos. If you have a card for sale, give me a good pic or I am going to bid lower. It is your responsibility to provide an accurate description of the item, not just a blurry cell phone shot. Spend the extra two minutes to get out your scanner or digital camera, and I will reward you as a buyer. God that pisses me off when I see something I want with a shitty ass photo.

Now, who has a good festivus pole that I can put a best offer on?


  1. Yes!!! Thank you!!!

    I totally feel your pain! This is by far one of your best write-ups. You would be amazed at some of the stories I get for why people can't pay.

    You can no longer leave negative feedback for buyers, which is BS, but I usually write "Buyer Never Paid!" or "Yet another deadbeat buyer, never paid."

    Plus, the "buyer strike" penalty is lame. Do the deadbeat buyers ever get booted or are they just temporarily suspended?

  2. Its three strikes and out. However, as a seller, you can block buyers with strikes usually.

  3. Three strikes and out? That's good to know.

    I also hate the Best Offer non-responders. I too have made reasonable best-offers, only to wait two days and see them expire, or have them declined outright.

    Is it that hard to make a counter-offer?

  4. If the gap between what I want and what you offered is too large, I never make a counter offer. It's a waste of time. A reasonable seller will lop 10% off, and if you're offering anything less than 3/4 of the asking price, we're going to get stuck and waste time.

    It's the same story, over and over and over again.

    Listed at 400, you offer 300. When I offer 360, or a ten eprcent discount, you -- noted cocksucker -- will ask for halfway between my last offer and your last offer or about 330.

    I will not accept 330, I will accept 360. I repropose 360, and of course, you go and offer 355 because YOU HAVE TO SAVE SOME MONEY.

    I eventually tell you to go fuck a avacado cause you're a piece of shit.

    What drives me absolutely wild is the market instability of ebay, and how fuck-wads really think that because the card has dropped from 75 to 25, that they're OWED a sale at 25.

    Other than the absolute superstars, each player has about 10 people willing to pony up money for the best cards out of any given set.

    Just because the 10 people that are okay spending over 100 dollars all have their cards, doesn't mean that the card is now only worth 60 cents on the dollar.

    The eBay market is saturated, but that says nothing about other markets or even the ebay market when/if a player gains popularity.

    People that think they're owed current eBay prices drive me nuts. The stock market has "bid" and "ask" for a reason. You can sit on your 5 cent shares for as long as you want, even if someone offers you 10 dollars each.

  5. I got offered 20 once for a 80 BIN OBO and the seller took it. Since then, I've pretty much offered 1/4 the BIN price. I also list my BIN OBO at about 1.5 times what I want for it. You never know if you'll find a mom who is new to ebay and all she knows in little Tommy wants the card that you have and you're the only one selling it 5 days before his birthday. But, if someone offers me anything decent, I'll usually take it.

  6. I usually don't try to low-ball people when OBO is concerned. I always make reasonable offers, but some sellers BIN prices are just CRAZY.

    See Burbank Sportscards for an example. All of their stuff is waaaaay overpriced.

  7. I agree with a lot of what you said about the downs of Ebay.

    My only off comment is in repsonce to: "However, now, with most sellers ONLY taking paypal or similar services, there needs to be a common courtesy statue." A few months back maybe as far back as last year Ebay dictated that ONLY Paypal could be mentioned in auctions as the ONLY form of payment. If other methods are mentioned the auctions are in danger of being pulled. There are a few work-arounds that people can use but they have to word it carefully and not specifically metion keywords like "Checks, Cash or Money Orders" in the item description. I think mentioning "for other forms of payment accepted please email" or a similar generic comment is acceptible.