Jesus is the Derek Jeter of Christianity

Fire Joe Morgan was so good at what they did that Im actually positive that there were a few tears shed about their departure from writing about baseball. Actual tears, not fake virtual "OMG Dont Leavez!" tears. They have had one last go of it over on deadspin.com, and I think I may have hurt myself laughing at their destruction of some articles written by morons who call themselves sports writers. Obviously after this post I wrote last week, their discussion of an article calling for Derek Jeter to be AL MVP was my favorite. Just fucking amazingly funny and well written, all of which are obviously absent here on this blog. Do yourself a favor and read.

http://deadspin.com/5360440/jesus-is-the-derek-jeter-of-christianity

This Had Better Not Be The Case

Last night I was driving home from work, listening to some of the dumbassery on fox sports radio. They were fawning over Derek Jeter's latest accomplishment, as well as congratulating him for curing three sick yankee fans of swine flu by winking at them. I was about to change the channel, as I always do with any Yankee news, when they said the dumbest thing I have ever heard out of the mouth of anyone about baseball. They said that this is Derek Jeter's year to win MVP because he will have broken Lou Gherig's yankee hit record. I actually had to swerve out of the oncoming lane because I was rendered momentarily retarded by the stupidity of that idea.

Now, Jeter has had a good season, but there are at least five other people who legitimately deserve to win the award more than him. Yet, aside from all semblence of rational thought, the people on the radio thought he should win as more of a lifetime acheivement award, and for breaking a TEAM record that has no bearing outside of the pinstripes.

Even more scary of a thought, I could actually see people jumping on with this idea. In fact, after Buster Olney's ridiculous fluff piece on what Jeter is all about, it could become gospel. No matter that someone like Joe Mauer has put together the best season that baseball has seen from someone not named A-Rod or Pujols in a long, long time.

Take a look for yourself. Its black and white to me that when you destroy every stat category in the league, as Mauer has, he should be MVP. Bottom line. For the American League, Mauer is at the top of every relevant stat, all while playing the most physically demanding position. When was the last time a Catcher did what he is doing this year? Oh, right, last year for the same fucking guy.

Sadly, because he plays in Minnesota, and because the MVP award has become more about which team makes the playoffs, Joe could be on the outside looking in AGAIN. Thats how stupid some of these voters really are. Its not about your individual production anymore, its about every other player on that 40 man roster too. I wonder what would have been the case if Mauer was playing with Texiera, Rodriguez, and company. What if Mauer's TEAM actually had a pitching staff without injuries that won 9 more games this year? Is he MVP then? See, thats the craziness of this whole thing, even with a pitching staff that is in shambles, Mauer has kept them afloat.

If it is truly about wins, as of today, Joe has factored into more wins for his team than any other player per his Win Share stats on Baseball Prospectus. Funny enough, if not for Mauer, the Twins may very well be in the cellar of the division. He leads the American League by a ton in VORP, EqA, AVG, OBP, OPS, SLG%, everything. Unlike Jeter, he actually deserves this award for this monster season. Then you can add in that he has done all he has this year while missing the first month due to a painful injury, and you have a great case.

I would even go so far as to say that Jeter wouldnt want the MVP just for being there. Then again, I have ZERO confidence anymore in anyone who has a pick in this crap. As long as people like Woody Paige and his idiot bretheren have a say, true MVPs like Mauer may have to deal with the disappointment.

Today, My Childhood Comes To Life - Version 4.0

Today is going to be awesome. Wolverine hits the box office, and I already have my tickets. Oddly enough, I am actually going watch everyone in the film but the title character. Personally, as a complete and utter dork, I have loved the X-Men since I first started watching the show as a little kid. Then, as I got into comics, X-Men became a huge favorite of mine. How could you not love normal people who get super powers? Its the same reason I love heroes, you put yourself in the universe you are watching.

One of my favorite X-Men has always been Gambit. I loved the style, I loved the mannerisms, and I LOVED his powers. Despite wearing pink and purple, he was just a suave son of a bitch with a badass way to beat the living hell out of you. Obviously, since I could never live up to that, he was my guy. I liked Wolverine, but didnt love him the way my friends did. To them Wolvie was the man, to me he was just an overhyped fan favorite, the Derek Jeter of the X-Men.

As my love for the X-Men grew, people like Deadpool (another personal fave), Blob, Maverick (Agent Zero in the film), and Emma Frost became very familiar to me, and Sabretooth was a villian we all hated from the cartoon. Because of this, I am very excited to see how they are portrayed on screen, especially because I am a big fan of Liev Schrieber and Ryan Reynolds. Too bad Deadpool is getting the hack treatment, hopefully it wont be too bad. What's funny is that I have the entire Wolverine Origin story from when they did it a few years ago in the comics, and I really didnt like it all that much. Hopefully this movie will be much better. It looks that way.

Based on the Movie, Rittenhouse has put out their typical set of movie cards with autos. I am really digging the set, especially this ridiculous Gambit card signed by Taylor Kitsch. If you get it, I will pay you for it.



H/T Trader's cracks

A-Rod May Have Taken Steroids, But He Is Not a Bonds Level Douche

Man, it really sucks that A-rod was one of the players stupid enough to take steroids. Not only does it give the Jeter lovers more ammo for their asinine arguments, but it also says a lot as to the state of baseball in general.

Listen, ill give him kudos for admitting it. It just shows exactly what an admission of guilt can do for a person in a bad situation. Why cover it up and give us more reason to hate you? I have lost respect for Arod, but not as much as I would have if he didnt admit to it. *AHEM* BONDS *AHEM*

When it comes down to it, the skill it takes to hit major league pitching far outweighs the balance of using drugs to get stronger. Just because you have massive muscles and can recover from injury faster does not mean a Johan Santana change up is easier to hit. You have to have that skill. Plus, its not THAT big of a deal if a home run travels 450 instead of 425. Again, no excuse, but its worth mentioning.

The issue also hinges on the fact that there are so many players out there who just wont say that they took roids, and that it is still rampant in todays league. Steroids are bad for the game, and though they may empower you in the short term, the long term effects are ridiculous.

Arod will still be the best ever when things are said and done, and though his stuff is now tainted, its not going to be much different when we look back on him 20 years from now thanks to his apology. Clemens, Bonds, and company though, with their constant lack of respect for the public, will never reach any level until they come clean. A few people in the hobby could also gain from that idea.

Alex Rodriguez's Shattered Love Life Is For Sale On Ebay

So, what would you do if you have a ball signed by A-rod and Cyndi Rodriguez (former)? Why, you have it authenticated and put up on eBay, of course! Arod's former doorman had this ball signed by the slugger one day, and because the economy is tight, he has decided to post it for sale.

Quote from Derek Jeter, "You bitch! I thought you said you were done with her!"

Really, the price is awful, and I am not sure who would actually want a ball signed by Arod AND his ex-wife. Thats just dumb. The funniest thing about this auction? JSA authenticated Cyndi's auto too. Thats called "over doing it," folks. Besides, who would fake that anyways?

My Yankee Stadium Goodbye

I had this long ass post about how much I hate the Yankees ready to go, but really I am just glad to get rid of this awful plethora of Yankee love that has been choking me since the beginning of the season. Bring on the wrecking balls so I dont have to sit through any more 13 minute epics on sportscenter every hour, and so I dont have to see any more Yankee loads blown all over MLB.com each time I check the Twins score. There are more important things going on - forget this meaningless bullshit.

Derek Jeter, Yankee Captain / Bad Ass MC

I just wanted to link to this post on MLB.com because I have yet to find an article about New York Hero/Nobel Prize Winner/Poet Lauriate/Baron Von Clutchtenstein Derek Jeter that doesnt contain the words "Yankee Captain."

First off, I think Derek Jeter is THE most overrated player in MLB history. His stat lines are mediocre, his fielding is way below average, and he isnt even the best shortstop on his team. However, his ability to stay with one high market team is only outdone by the calmness of his eyes and his uncanny ability to find missing children that have been abducted in the last five years.

Secondly, being a captain in baseball isnt saying much, so why use it like its part of his first name? There are only two in the whole freaking league, mainly because you dont need them, and the only other one is Jason "My Last Name is Publically Traded" Varitek. Hmm, interesting trend. Big market teams need captains because most of them are filled with free agents from other small market teams, so they promote the one guy who came up through their farm system to be the "captain." His duties? Well, glad you asked! For Jeter, he needs to be on call any time someone needs a clutch person. Need a best man for your wedding party, day of? Jeter is there. Need a doctor to deliver your baby in a taxi on the way to the hospital? Jeter is there. Need someone to make an overly dramatic throw to first base because his range is so small that he cant properly get into position? Jeter is there. Need someone to hit 50 home runs, OPS a billion, and drive in 150, all with a VORP in the stratosphere? Well, thats another "non-clutch" person on the team.

I love fighting with Jeter fans because they are the people that cite his WS wins, gold gloves and all star appearances like they are stats that actually matter to normal people. They may matter to dumbass HOF voters, but not to people that actually use stats that matter when determining a player's worth. Its like using Wins to determine whether or not a pitcher should be in the hall of fame. "Wait, Bert Blyleven has over 4,000Ks but less than 300 wins? He's out."

Listen, I know he is a first ballot HOFer, and his autos are worth a ton, but I think its a travesty. If Jeter played for Pittsburgh, we would be having a conversation about someone with the star power of Omar Vizquel instead of him. I know there are a lot of people who agree with me, but there arent many sportswriters who acknowledge that fact, right FJM? Regardless, Jeter will still get the most votes for the All Star game because the normal fan is dumber than Paris Hilton after a lobotomy, but that doesnt mean you have to agree. I dont - but I do need someone to jump my car using only mind power, can someone call Jeter?