Thursday, September 25, 2008

A Comment On Collecting Terms

For some reason, every single collector has to have terms they use to describe everything. There is no wavering, its all the same term, no variety allowed. I dont understand why you cant just say "Wow, what a card!" when you get a nice card, instead of "YESSSSSSS MOJO!" It makes you sound half your age and half your smarts. But, I have commented at length about MOJO because it seems like it has wrapped its slimy oozing tenticle around every douche's brain in this hobby.

What about the word "SICK" to describe the prowess of the card? Obviously its just as bad, as every dimwit in every card store uses it like it was their first word as a child. Why cant we just say, "Fuck me, that card is awesome!" instead of "Get some life support, that card is SIIIICK!" I want to shoot myself in the face with buckshot for maximum pain.

Why is every relic and auto card called a "HIT"? The term is a little more practical than the mind raping nature of the above two, as most cards like that are a hit in a pattern of packs. But still, that is pretty dumb that we cant come up with better names with more descriptive variety.

How about the word "PULL"? This one is actually relevant to any chance ridden hobby. I have seen it in Miniature games that have random boosters, I have even seen it used for lottery tickets. Yes you are hearing that right. Its almost like we take a burning hot emblazened prod and burn these things into our brain, so that the neural pathway always leads to that term when encountering something of that nature. Its fucking ridiculous, and it makes collectors seem VERY ignorant and simple.

Basically, I hate people who cant think for themselves, and the collecting base is so full of these people that I think its reached critical mass. Lets hope the hobby doesnt run to a toilet and crap out the normal people, which always seems to happen.


  1. Hang on one moment...who cares what people say when they are happy with a card they pulled from a pack?

    You can't expect each and every person who pulls (insert name here) to make up some new slang/term for it?

    I think you are over analyzing every single thing in the hobby. Of course, I am also not one that does these type of things much (OMG MOJO!) but still.

    Now, this last comment is not just about you but it seems no one can find anything they enjoy anymore, at least not the Bloggers. This hobby should make people happy if not, try something else.

    If I dwelled on the fact that I cannot afford high end products all day long I'd be miserable so instead I try to find something a little higher than the lowest product around (Opening Day, etc) and see the good in it.

    At the end of the day, it makes me happy and keeps me collecting for just one more day.

  2. Listen, I am not expecting everyone to come up with a new term every time, I want people to stop saying the same fucking non-sensical thing everytime they do.

    Dont give me this crap about collecting for one more day and all that. Im sorry, playing the "lets all be friends" card doesnt work here.

    I started this blog as a free space to complain about or exhault anything I wanted - and it so seems like there are a lot of people around the blogosphere who do the same thing, both before and after me. If there were a lot of good things happening, I would talk about it. Sadly, this hobby is filled with idiots, scammers, and people who care only about money. This leads to a lot of angry people including myself.

    Now, dont get me wrong, I wouldnt continue if I didnt enjoy it. I do, and I will continue to buy the stuff I like, and crap on the stuff I hate. If there is more stuff I hate then stuff I like, there will be lots of crapping.

    Mario, I love ya man, but I cant take your approach on this.

  3. The thing is, this hobby is not aimed at us anymore. We are all grown men in our late 20's, 30's, and beyond. Sitting around complaining about what people are saying when they are actually happy makes no sense and makes all of us look like bitter, old, men.

    Do a blog on 12-year old YouTube kids busting high-end stuff and dumping the base around for the relics than I am on that bandwagon.

    To each his own, though.

  4. I am a bitter old man, :)

    The hobby is completely aimed at us, more so than it ever has been. Manufacturers are creating more products that go to extreme length to preserve cost and "valuability" in their products by raising the content and prices of the products. Those things are solely for adults, as a 10 year old could never buy a 100 dollar box of anything without a parent.

    Besides, the complaints are just pet peeves that I soothe by taking the time to point out to the hundreds of people who come here looking for a good read. Face it, controversy is more readable than "all is well!"

    I guess if people dont like bitterness, they shouldnt read blogs. That is the flavor of the general blog populace. Personally I think there are more out there who are "bitter-er" than I am than those who are less. I have met some bitter ass people since I started, and I love it.

  5. I totally didnt mean to say products 4 times in the first sentence.

  6. I think my outlook on the hobby is a little towards Mario's side on this, but it is your Blog, and if something bothers you, what better place to write about it. I do agree though, if I here someone say mojo on a video break 1 more time, I'm gonna break my monitor.

  7. I am mostly with Gellman on this. It bugs the crap out of me to hear people say the most ridiculous things after opening a pack. It is the same irritation that occurs every Christmas when my parents pull out the old videos for my kids to watch, and there I am 12 years old saying "coolness!" over my Canseco Rated Rookie in my stocking.

    But I for one feel like 90% of that irritation comes from what people consider "mojo". When you open a pack of Absolute and you get a McFadden RPM jersey card, that's not Mojo, that's expected. You just payed $40 for pack with a jersey card guarantee, so why would getting what you payed for be Mojo?

    See, I like to pay attention to the non-verbal reactions. For instance, when I bought a box of chrome and got a Jonathan Stewart Refractor auto (I am a big Panthers fan) a little urine left its housing. I can't remember what I said, but I know what I felt.

    When a dealer sold my buddy the remaining packs of 06 classics of an open box at a HUGE discount cause he thought the hits were gone, I don't remember what my buddy said when he pulled the Quad jerseys of Manning, Favre, Dawson and Montana, but I remember that the dealer looked like King Hippo after getting hit in the gut on Tyson's Punchout.

    And my personal favorite is watching anyone on youtube get something huge and see them get so excited that they drop it. And you immediatly hear the sound of a card losing 50% of its value. Now that my friends is where I find joy.

  8. The hobby at this point is what you make of it. You can either spend the big bucks on boxes of product that you KNOW will not hold their value, or you can simply purchase or trade for the cards that you do want.

    The manufacturers realized a long time ago that kids no longer collect cards. They still have low end product (First Edition, Opening Day, etc) that MIGHT bring some kids back into the fray and satisfy parents who want to try to get their kids into collecting, but let's face reality, when boxes of Upper Deck Black Hockey are $300 for TWO cards, it's not a kids' hobby any more than Comic Books are a kids hobby or toy collecting is something for kids.

    We need to get out of that mentality and realize that the manufacturers are catering to OUR whims, because WE demand the high end product with relics and autos galore. They don't make this stuff in a vacuum, companies as large as Topps and Upper Deck carefully craft each and every product with market research and focus groups (OK if they don't they damn well should be).

    In order to be a happy collector you have to be happy with what you collect. I suspect that Gellman isn't happy with his chosen teams/players lately due to poor performance on the field. When your teams aren't faring well, the entire sport can be soured. I love Hockey as a sport, and I would love to be watching a ton of it, however, because my beloved Kings are in the Nth rebuilding year and literally suck on ice, I have no love for Hockey because it hurts to watch. It was the same feeling I had about my beloved Angels between, oh let's say 1987 and 2000, when I spent more time going to Padres games than watching Angels on TV. I used to collect Hockey cards with a passion, savoring jerseys, autos and rookies (as long as they were Kings), but I stopped when the Kings became such a joke that they were no longer even a thought in my mind.

    Human beings are fickle. One day we love you, the next day we could care less.

  9. I just have always thought it was dumb that people have to say some sort of non-sensical catch phrase every time they hit something. Its just like they need everyone to know how cool they are for pulling a 5 dollar jersey card.


    I just think to myself how they have the intellect of a 13 year old and have cats they call kids.

  10. I usually just go "oh cool" or even worse "neat!"